Humor and Perspective: You’re only as old as you act!

"Come on Mr. Attitude Man, we're burning daylight!"

I can always tell when Mr. Attitude Man has writer’s block. He dangles a jerky treat in front of me and begs me to write a blog post. And you thought only dogs begged!

I know that Mr. Attitude Man wrote his last post about “aging.” I know this because for some annoying reason, he says the words out loud as he taps away at his keyboard. He’s always making noises of some kind and then he has the audacity to tell ME to “hush” every time I let out a simple little bark! Sounds like a double standard to me. I think I’ll make note of this for a future blog post…or should that be “dog post!”

Since he’s the one who brought up aging, I want to put in my “two cents” worth. I don’t have a lot of sympathy for him and Mrs. Techno Lady. I’m 10 years of age, fit, and looking good…but hardly a day goes by that they don’t say, “Miss Lillie is really 70 in “human years!” What’s their point? The last time I checked, I’m not human! I scratch a lot (come to think of it, so does Mr. Attitude Man), take many naps each day (hmmm…so does Mr. Attitude Man), howl at the moon (Oh no, he’s starting to sound more like a dog) and walk on four legs (Whew! I was afraid for a minute he was a dog too). Bottom line, I’m a dog and proud of it!

If he’s so smart, why doesn’t he switch to “dog years?” Then he would only be 9 (well, actually he would be 9.3 but knowing his propensity for stretching the truth, he would probably round down to 8)! And Mrs. Techno Lady would only be 8 but you didn’t hear it from me. She would tell you she’s 5 ½ and holding!

"Don't feel bad Mr. Attitude Man, you're only 9 in dog years!"

Actually, humans need to use the “dog 1=7 conversion chart” for a lot of things in their lives. Instead of having to do 60 minutes of exercise a day, they would only have to do 8.5 minutes and the 2800 calories a day being consumed would only be 400 calories. The 35 pounds Mr. Attitude Man would like to get rid of would convert to 5 pounds. Surely, this would make him feel better about himself.

I’m proud of being the big One-0! Occasionally, Mr. Attitude Man gets it right! His belief that you’re only as old as you feel…and act is also my belief. And I hope he remembers this the next time “the puppy” comes out in me and I chew up his hat. I’m just acting young and feeling good! Just trying to hang onto my youth! I might not do this if they would quit telling me I’m almost 77! Just saying…..

 Print